Mind of my Stroked Brain

There are many balls bouncing about all the time. When we take a snapshot of this, they all seem stationary.  Some are up, some down, some somewhere... But they are all in motion going up or going down. When it is up, it becomes slow - very hard for the ball to make out if it will continue going up or turn back down. However, for the one that is down, the impact with the ground is unmistakable. Sure, it is at the lowest point. But there is only one direction to go from there. It is very powerful to know that... 

I had gone for a check up today to the hospital. It was an endoscopy test.  Tube with camera goes through the nostril, through the nasal cavity and down to view the throat, Vocal folds etc.  Usual stuff. No fuss there. The fun started after. The doc suggested we do a "Barium swallow test" so as to confirm something before recommending next course of action. Instead of doing the whole exercise of going home, scheduling again and coming all the way again, it made a lot more sense to finish it off the same visit. Some checking and they confirmed we can be accommodated today. So we went to another floor another department. That place is a maze. We need Google maps to find our way anywhere. After getting there , they said it's a quick test. Except I needed a covid negative report. The option was going back or get their rapid test. Logic prevailed again.  Except, we had to go to the emergency department for it. Different floor and some more playing in the maze. It took a while,

Last night, my daughter (the younger one), sat next to me, took my phone and was helping herself on Amazon. I am sure she has seen me and my wife on it many times to ape us. But I was stumped by how comfortable she was with it without being taught formally. Search terms were accurate - some of them I couldn't think of doing, adding to shopping list, moving to the cart, etc. It must be a combination of intuitive interface and comfort with exploring things and learning. I never succeed to get my father to use even WhatsApp. My mother, with her willingness to try, is still apprehensive of it. What happens to us after a while. Even with willingness, the ability to explore and learn goes down or completely goes away... Anyway, back to the main story.. After browsing around for a while, she moved 3 items to the cart and wanted me to buy them. Before that, there was the "Buy Now" button which she very much wanted to hit, she asked me and decided against it. Anyway, 3 items in th

It's very itchy as I am wearing a diaper all the time. And I can't scratch as I am wearing a diaper all the time. It's a bloody "Catch 22". Or to be more accurate, a bloody "unable to Catch 22"!

As far as I know, the bits that we (humans) regenerate are hair, nails and skin. They are strictly not regeneration as its just replenishment of dead cells by more dead cells. Some animals regenerate small and simple things like tails, etc. The only animal (known to man), that regenerates and entire limb if severed, is the Salamander. Skin, Bones, muscles, nervous system, etc - the whole works. A lot of research is being done with the salamander (for a very long time) to understand this. It hasn't gone far yet... For something to grow, for the 1st time, every cell knows what to do because of the DNA. Its a sort of biological reference/ Blue print of what to build. Once done, if there has to be a regrowth, the DNA has the reference, but does the brain instruct what to do? When part of the brain is damaged (due to stroke or trauma or something else), what happens? We are not regrowing anything, but the brain has to reconnect neurons in a different path to do the same thing. There is

I have had mosquitoes sitting on me regularly enjoying their drink uninterrupted. Some places I can feel them, sometimes not, sometimes it itches, etc. But I have got used to them and ignore them for a long time... I have had all sorts of insects. None of them have bitten me. They are amusing to watch. Once in a while, a small spider runs along. I don't know if they bite. Sometimes it itches very much. Ants are a very regular visitors. Don't know if these ones bite either (the small brown variety).  Off late, I can reach some of them - on my abdomen or right hand. But I have got used to them as well and just ignore them. Initially, I don't recollect who had told me, I was told I would feel strange feelings - like burning, ants crawling, etc. on me as the limbs recover. So when I could feel that crawly feeling, I was overjoyed that my hand was healing. I was so disappointed later to see an actual ant taking a stroll. Over time I have got used to it. They don't trouble me

After the stroke, I have been struggling with vision. Blurryness due to increased power, struggle seeing things in shorter distance (just age related I guess - but it got very sudden and accelerated after the stroke), progressive vision disruption in the left eye (had started before the stroke - don't know if the stroke has accelerated it). Double vision... I needed a eye checkup badly... So I got one yesterday. If you are wondering how I managed to get to a eye hospital in my state, I didn't. The Mountain came to Mohammed. A very dear friend very kindly brought the hospital home. My friend and two doctors were with me for a good part of last afternoon with everything from a monitor for the lines of different sized letters, the vision checking glasses with a huge briefcase full of lenses, various scanning tools, etc. Whether worthy or not, I certainly felt like I was part of the royal family.. One of the lenses (left) of my glasses was patched up to see what it feels like. It f