Mind of my Stroked Brain

For a very long time after my stroke (almost 3 years) I struggled with my state. Not that I was not able to accept what had happened, I had crossed that hump, but what it had made me become. I used to be very active before the stroke. Physically doing things and active generally. I used to play a lot of sports in my younger days - and good at it, or so I believed. Suddenly becoming bed ridden and being unable to do anything was a lot to deal with. I used to love foods and to cook. Being unable to do either was the insult on top of the injury! Sometime back (a few months ago I guess) it dawned on me that that the root cause of this misery was that fellow. Comparing everything with him. He died long ago - well and truly! I wouldn't say i was born that day fully, but this new me came to life. I didn't start with a blank slate, I still had a mind, a mindset, an IQ, an EQ etc. A personality overall. But I was a completely new person! I was lucky enough that I came alive with many of...

I don't think I have really understood before the stroke what it means or does to your state of mind when you loose you ability to do things which i used to do so comfortably, confidently and took for granted..  Sure when i came across someone with an affected ability, i was compassionate and empathetic, but i truly had never understood as it was only an intellectual understanding and the real feeling is not possible to explain. While i was thinking about this, I realised that it's not only stroke or any other ailments, but very true for the process of getting old and frail as well. Its the same thoughts and feelings and getting dependent on others for things which once you could do..  Memories of younger days must come to haunt everytime.. So, when old aged people are stubborn, difficult, unreasonable or any other adjective, they are not acting crary, i imagine they ARE going crazy dealing with this emotion/ feeling. It's very hard for stroke patients because of the sudden...