Mind of my Stroked Brain

When I was younger, maybe till about late 30s till early 40s, I was not very sure about my purpose in life and was kinda hunting for it . Not overtly I guess, but there was an undercurrent of finding that purpose of what I was doing. Whether in what I read, what I did, what I chose to spend time to think about, etc.  It was a bit frustrating I think. I didn't realise or feel or understand the frustration, but it was there. I guess it was building up for a potent eruption later which is usually referred to as " mid life crisis ". Luckily or unluckily, the stroke got to me sooner. I had a even larger crisis presenting itself, dwarfing all other potential eruptions  Even after the stroke, many have told me there should be some purpose otherwise I wouldn't have been kept alive. I just have to find it. Even if I don't think about it very much, this thought seeded into my mind has played with the mind many many times.  I won't call this final, everything changes al