20230327: cast in stone ...

"So it shall be written... So it shall be done!"

Not my words. They are lines from a movie "the ten commandments" which was released in 1950s - much before I was born. 

The lead cast was Charleston Heston (Moses), Yul Brenner (Ramses) and Ann Baxter (Nefertari).

I feel it was ahead of other movies of that time - with regards to the visual effects and magnificence of the scenes.

I watched it for the first time when I was in 8th standard (8th grade). Whilst I knew the English language, I was not very comfortable or confident with it. My thinking language all the years earlier had been kannada.

So for some reason, I can't figure out why, the dialogues in that movie - especially those highlighted lines had an impact on my mind. It was a young adolescent highly impressionable mind at that time..

It was a very long movie - over 3 hrs. I don't remember exactly how long, but I am sure it was over 3 hrs as we bought the movie and it was the first movie we had bought which was 2 VHS tapes (VHS tapes could typically only hold upto 180 minutes).

Despite it being a long movie, I have watched it atleast 5-6 times. At various times separated by few years. Each time I have liked it - even though my mind was evolving, my tastes were evolving and technologies were evolving. The last time I watched it would have been over 2 decades ago though - now it may seem a little dragging and the VFX a bit dampened to my mind.

"So it shall be written.. So it shall be done."

It might have different interpretations to different folks. For me, it just meant "it was cast in stone" - that is what it literally translated into in the movie - where important words would be inscribed on stone tablets.

For me it meant the words I say can't be changed or contested by me later.

It was very hard to do this in practice though. It meant I had to write things down somewhere everytime - not very practical for a growing guy. There were too many distractions to it happening. Maybe that is why many maintain a diary. It's a record for them of not just words but feelings of that time...

The first time I encountered the stone was in late 1998 or early 1999. the stone was in the form of my email box (lotus cc mail those days).

Stuff I wrote to someone and what someone wrote to me were cast in stone. I could say whatever I wanted later, but my words were cast in stone. (In some mail server in the office but I could access the stone from anywhere)

I can say something today to you. A few days or weeks later, I couldn't change my mind and say something else. I have to accept I am changing my mind and then put a different inscription on the stone.

A few months later, I may be confused with what I said. I may not be sure of what I said. But I could always refer to the stone to refresh my memory and be sure.

A few years later, I may completely forget and deny I even said something like that. It is a very genuine possibility.

last year, I had got a notice from the tax folks about something I had filed in 2017. My accountant said it was probably because I had submitted it some particular way that year. I denied it as it is something very illogical and something I would have definitely not done . He didn't know because I have started working with him only in the last 2 years - I worked with a different accountant earlier. After some back and forth with him. I realised it might have been inscribed on my stone.

It was over 5 years, the stone was not what it used to be. I didn't have to look for some old backup in one of my old hard drives.

I don't know where the stone is, it could be in India, in America, in Australia or in Timbuktu . It is a stone that floats around on the cloud somewhere.

What is important is I could retrieve it. Sure enough, I found the inscriptions. I had done exactly what is illogical. I had not done it without realising it. There are a whole trail of conversations with my previous accountant about exactly this issue and what I did finally.

The one that is absolutely illogical and I would have definitely not done and have absolutely no recollection of any of it. And I was not lying or pretending - I genuinely had no recollection of any of it. 

While this is a recent instance, I have had many many such instances where I have had to rely on the reliable stone.

My love affair with emails started very early - during the turn of the century when I realised that worth of the stone. So I used to write emails regarding almost anything I could.

When I was working before my stroke - our office was small. Almost everyone was in line of sight for me and a shout away. Still I used to send tons of emails to everyone. There are many instances when I have sent a long email to my partner and he has told me it would take much less time and effort to walk up and speak with him instead of sending the email. I have done that as well - to have a conversation first and come back to my desk and send the same thing on email later.

Folks thought I was emailing. I was busy etching on my stone .

I send mails to myself to record my thoughts at times. I still do... 

That was the biggest issue I had with WhatsApp initially - till i figured out a workaround (now it is a feature). I still have a group with nobody else on my phone. It's called "nobody". Very imaginative name 😂

Some years before my stroke, when I felt emails were taking too much time, I was trying audio recordings - like in dictaphones. I never got very comfortable with it - not because I was not comfortable speaking with myself but I didn't figure out a reliable way to retrieve what I inscribed. There is no value to the stone if I couldn't find what I wanted to reliably and quickly.

Nowadays, I am guessing video snippets can be the in thing.

In any case, for me, emails are the only thing now.

One thing I am very certain of - our minds and brains are not reliable - especially in the scale of years. It is always advisable to find your stone that you are comfortable with to inscribe and retrieve. so that we can cast it in stone.

So it shall be written... So it shall be done.