20220115 : Pictures and Words

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I have always been a "man of few words". My mind saw in pictures. When someone described something, it first converted itself into a picture/ a diagram/ some sort of depiction in my mind so I could understand better. When someone asked me to explain something, I would ask for a paper and pen so I could draw something. At work, the whiteboard and marker were my best friends. I was also particularly good with imagining things in 3D. It's probably why I loved 'Engineering Drawing' when most hated it.

"A picture spoke a thousand words" to me.

And then the stroke happened.

And I was left with only the "thousand words"...

I struggled to befriend it.

In the early days, it was an impossible thing. Everything in my head was pictures - and I had to translate them into words. Not just words, but very short and simple words - with the morse code first and the printed keyboard after. I had to be very frugal with words. It was a nightmare. I hated it.

Then slowly I realised there is no other way out. I had to befriend them if I had to survive.

So I started flirting with it. This was when I could just start typing on the phone and WhatsApp.

I had to be still brief - owing to my constraints and weakness in the fingers. 

So I started experimenting with a sort of "precise writing". Everything was "how do I say this with fewer words".

Then I got better with finger strength. 

So I started with trying different words to say the same thing and experiment with what conveys the same thing better. I started trying different word structures like using different points of view, metaphors, etc.

I guess the flirting turned into a love affair slowly.

Mind you, I haven't increased my vocabulary or grammar etc.

Now, when I am amidst conversations when folks visit etc, I find myself constantly saying in my head - "that's not the right word, it doesn't convey the right meaning" or "that's not the right set of words, it doesn't convey the correct feeling/ emotion" etc.

I guess the love affair is cemented with marriage...


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