20201230: The Stroke experience

On the day when i had the stroke, some very interesting things happened.

The instant I had the stroke, the very instant, i saw it happening. I say i saw it, because i was seeing it from not inside myself but outside. The view was somewhere near my feet, a bit above. I was sleeping on my stomach with my face turned left. I clearly saw somebodys hand, actually not full hand, just palm reach to my right shoulder, just close to the neck, and yank at it. It tore the flesh, made a loud ripping noise like you get when you rip a velcro. And the whole body moved down a few inches.

The next instand i was back seeing from inside, as usual... The room was spinning, and i threw up next to the bed..i remember thinking its vertigo caused by anxiety and stress and i ll be fine in a few days. I remember one of my managers having had it in Melb a few  years ago and was out of action for a few days. I was very anxious that day as we were having a team from a big company from uk visiting us in the morning to discuss and finalise a big project. We had worked to build to that meeting for several months.. in that dazed state, i told my wife to call my colleage  (he was the lead consultant on the pursuit), and tell him i wont be able to come to the office/ meeting. I dont know what time it was. I blacked out next instant..

Next i recollect, i was seeing myself again from outside. I was seeing from somewhere near the roof of the room, just above the door. I was limp totally with my head drooping to the left. My back was resting on a friend's chest and i was in a sitting position on the bed near the bottom of the bed. This observation was for what seemed for 5 or 6 seconds, then it was blank again.

Next i realised being on the stretcher, i could see nothing and hear nothing. But recollect lying down in a narrow space and realised where i was. I particularly remember my left hand against the stretchers railing and feeling it so cold against the skin. This was something like 2 to  3 seconds, and blank.

This time it was complete power off and maybe 3 weeks when i was shifted to the ward and initally even for a few days in the ward, i had no clue what was happening around me.

This does not mean i was completly shut off either. Some auditory inputs and visual inputs were going in, but my brain had no idea how to process them and they blended into my fantastical hallucinations( or dreams , i dont know which) . I shall write about them next time....