20201225 : My early mornings
The Early mornings are the hardest.... Not because i dont like the time, i used to be an early riser earlier...
The problem is the dreams. In my dreams, however vague the storyline, I'm still healthy, active, normal.
When i wake up, I'm still in bed like a vegetable. Reality hits me. For a brief few moments, I'm confused which is the reality and for it to sink in. My body shudders and moves violently, involuntarily..
I feel like a dog running and chasing something in its sleep, if you ve seen one..
Thats why i dont sleep again during the day, no matter how tired i am. I dread going thru the feeling again.
But what i dread more is that someday I'll appear as a vegetable even in my dreams. That will be the day, i feel, the subconscious has also given up... Till then, the struggle continues..
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